The Therapy Journals of the Fat-Headed Klingon Woman

One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

Allure Trip Journal Part 3: Moron Moments, Embarkation, and Sailaway! June 7, 2012

Hello all!!  And we continue again…

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Now then, here is where I had the first of several of what I call my Moron Moments!  When we got out of the cab and paid the driver, ($16 with tip, if you’re interested) it seemed like sheer chaos, despite the assurances of folks here on CC that there would be plenty of assistance and direction regarding where to go and with whom to leave your luggage.  Being the small-town person that I am, I had no idea whether there were any “unauthorized” porters hanging around, or what they might look like if there were, and wasn’t sure whether to give our bags to the first person who asked, or just hang onto them a little longer.  So when the first porter asked, I said no, we’ll keep them with us.  What I thought was we would get asked several more times before we made it inside.  But… we didn’t.  We dragged all our bags inside and went through security (As an aside, when I handed the first agent our BCs/DLs, Daughter S. said “Calm down, Mom, you’re shaking!!”)  Then we went through check-in and all, STILL LUGGING OUR BAGS!!  I think I might have even asked somebody after we got our pictures made if there was anybody to leave the luggage with before boarding, and they basically said we were stuck with it.

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So we had our pictures made, walked the gangway, and (hallelujah chorus) we were finally, really, truly onboard the Allure of the Seas.  It was real, after all my months of planning and obsessing- we were actually there.  It was big, it was beautiful, and we could not begin to explore it until we could ditch our bags, so the kids plopped down in some comfy chairs under a tree in the middle of Royal Promenade and finished their Pop Tarts while I went here and there taking care of business, like getting our SeaPass cards punched, asking for a map, etc.  NOTE:  They did not give us a map of any kind at check-in, and nobody said anything about The Boy needed a wristband, being 11 years old.  When reading CC, I had understood these things would happen at check-in, and they didn’t.  No big deal, just pointing it out.

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The girls weren’t interested in going ANYWHERE until we were luggage-free, but my little man is always ready to see what’s going on, so he and I went to Central Park.  After reading on Cruise Critic (CC) the many rave reviews and drooling reports of that famous Roast Beef Sandwich, there was no way in heck I was going to miss out on this Embarkation Experience, even if I had to carry my luggage through the park on my head.  I didn’t have to go that far, of course, because I had little slaves… uh, teenagers to sit there and watch it for me.  We joined the line of chaos that was Park Café (two lines- salad v. sandwiches, if you’re interested.  I guess if you want both, you’re screwed! 🙂 )  I had one Roast Beef and one Turkey and Guacamole Panini.  Holy cats, it was as good as advertised!  I could eat those every single day!  That horseradish is not something I eat in everyday life, but it definitely added a kick to the sandwich.  That stuff will clear your sinuses, let me tell ya!

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Finally, it was after 1:00, and The Boy and I returned to the girls, to find them hot, tired, and bored silly.  We went to find our room (Again, Deck 3 #838, if you’re interested.) Desmond was our stateroom attendant, and he was very friendly.  We ditched the luggage, a couple of us changed into swimsuits, and we hit the Boardwalk, which of course was one of the things the kids were most looking forward to… (musically) Carousellllll!  We tried the Boardwalk Dog House (The Boy had a Coney Island and I had a German dog, not a dachshund.  We left those at home.)  Then we hit the ice cream parlor.  It would turn out to be the only time we went there all week.  It was very good, but they were happy with the free offerings elsewhere.  I had Mint Chocolate Chip, one of the girls tried the Mango Sherbet, and The Boy had… what else?  Chocolate.)  They rode the carousel ( I think I still felt too silly at this point to get on it yet, but they would eventually insist that I join them before the week was out, and I decided it was worth it.)

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So we decided to hit the pool deck.  Daughter J. and The Boy swam.  Daughter S. found a lawn chair and demonstrated proper Vacation Relaxation Mode.  Eventually we found the yogurt machine and I ordered my first Mama Drink of the trip.  (Frozen Lemonade, if you’re interested.  In my best Cousin Eddie Griswold voice:  It was goo-oood! :D)

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Then I got bored watching them swim and made them get out and we breezed through the Promenade and hit the Cupcake Cupboard, that being what Daughter S. was looking forward to most.  Sadly, she was disappointed.  Somehow she described the cupcakes as “weird-tasting and too fancy” but I could have slept in there!  My first cupcake was Lemon.  Personally, I thought they were great.  Seems like they were always on the cool side, temperature wise, but I’d rather have a cold cupcake than a hot, melty cupcake so hey, I was fine with them.

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We returned to the room, unpacked a little, and went to Muster Drill.  Our station was in the Promenade, right where the Embarkation gangway was.  Seemed like most people were quiet and respectful during the video, and we stood around waiting to be officially dismissed and it never seemed to happen, so people just drifted away!

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At some point earlier, I had made it a point to locate my intended sailaway spot, Deck 11 aft, Port side.  So after Muster we went straight there, and the view was awesome!  It was great fun, Daughter J. watching the Dreamworks party and complaining about wanting to be down there in the Aqua Theater, but I told her she could see it just fine and there would be plenty more opportunities to see the characters, so suck it up, because we’re not going anywhere right now!  (Daughter J. is the one who is developmentally delayed, and the Dreamworks program was high on her list of priorities for this trip.  Most particularly the How To Train Your Dragon character of Hiccup.  Remember this- there’s a story about this later.

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So finally we realized the ship and started moving, and we were all, “Oh my gosh, we’re moving!  We’re sailing!  Auuugggghhhh!”  And then…  it started raining.  It was amazing how cold that rain was.  We and a few other hearty souls who had staked out that spot stayed there and waited to pass the Webcam Building.  (Rain be damned, I had requested a SailAway wave, and I was going to be there, just in case.  (Sure enough, I watched it when we got home, and you can’t see us clearly, but it’s a blur of blue at the back with the bits of white that was our shorts and pants, bobbing up and down as we jumped and waved frantically.)

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And so, sailaway happened and we were underway.  Daughter J. was freezing and it was almost time to go to dinner.  We were already feeling the movement of the ship, which, given the size of the thing, came as a total surprise to us, but which we now realize was a little more than normal, according to experienced cruisers who were there.  So on our way to supper we located a restroom, washed our hands, etc.  (Daughter S. is a bit of a germaphobe – she was in heaven with sanitizer dispensers so widely available. :D)

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We had also checked out our table location at some point earlier in the day, and wouldn’t you know- we were right in front of the door.  I mean, the VERY first table you see when you walk in.  This could have distinct plusses and minuses.  For sure, one plus would be if The Boy started acting like a heathen during dinner, I could take him out and beat him quickly and easily.  On the minus side, we were immediately visible to everybody who walked in the room, whether we were behaving well or poorly.  (And I count myself in that behavior thing, because sometimes when it’s a good moment, our family tends to get silly and get the giggles, and I could just see us getting cracked up about something and everybody looking at us like we were completely uncouth.)

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This post is already way too long, so I think I’ll cut it off here.  Up next, our first night’s dinner and first port day- Nassau!

Until next time,

D.

 

My Kids’ Graduation and A Dream Vacation: The Ultimate One-Two Punch! May 18, 2012

Pre-School Graduation!!!

These aren’t my daughters, but this is how big they should still be! Congratulations to my beautiful girls!!

Hello all!  Again, with the two months between posts!  I’m a sad excuse for a blogger, what can I say?  Things have gotten pretty surreal, pretty fast.  My twin daughters, my baby girls, those two beings I just gave birth to, what, 5 minutes ago?  They graduate from high school tonight.  Yeah.  Graduate.  High school.  Gowns, tassels, all of that.   I’m feeling ok right now, but hopefully I won’t be too over-emotional tonight.  I’ll get back to you after 7 p.m. Central time.

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Oh, the other surreal thing is that in 9 days I will be on the biggest cruise ship in the world, Royal Carribean‘s Allure of the Seas.  Nine days, man!  That just blows the mind.  I booked this trip over a year ago, and it’s finally here.  I’ve done so much plotting and planning and daydreaming!  I’ve researched and made lists, and yes, spent a bundle on extras like ‘Formal Night’ clothes (and the undergarments needed for said clothes.)  I’ve stocked up on camera batteries and sunblock, I’ve budgeted for photos and tours and fruity drinks. 😀  Now it’s just a matter of getting there.  Thank GOD for my mother, who in all her magnanimousness is taking us to the airport, because her *cough*almost 40-yr old*cough* daughter is too big a chicken to attempt driving in Dallas-Ft.Worth!   (To be fair, my car really isn’t in any good shape for a road-trip to Dallas, so that’s part of the reason.  And yes, car repair and improvement is next on my spending list.  Right after celebrating graduation with the kids.)

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So anyway.  Busy life, happy life.  Everything changes.  The week after we get home from the trip, my baby sister is getting married.  A couple weeks after that, we have a family reunion to attend.  And somewhere in there I have to find time to gather a ton of paperwork for applications that should have been filled out long before now:  financial aid for Daughter S., Vocational Rehabilitation for Daughter J., and online public school for The Boy.  (More on that one later.)

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Look for my next post to be a full review of the cruise, complete with pictures.  It will probably show up in about 3 months!  (Not really.  I’ll get it out sooner, I promise!)  Wish me non-teary eyes tonight and then in a week it’s Sailaway time!  🙂  Wooo hoooooo!

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Until next time,

D.

 

I’m Not Drowning, I’m Free-Diving for Oyster Pearls! July 8, 2011

free diving with monofin

Image via Wikipedia

Hello all.  You know how sometimes in life, you’re cruising along, things seem to be going pretty well, life is tolerable.  Then you have a bump.  A shoulder-check in the school hallway of life, you might say.  But it’s ok, maybe it was a coincidence.  Maybe they just didn’t see you there.  You know, it’s not like you were pants-ed and shoved in a locker, right?  So you keep walking, and then before you see it coming, you’ve bypassed entirely the experience of being pants-ed and lockered, and graduated to the full-on upside down swirly in the boys’ gym room toilet? 

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Well, that’s the direction my life took today.  The career opportunity I had been holding onto… fell out from under me with reckless abandon.  My financial outlook… took a spectacular engine-on-fire, parachutes-at-the-ready, spiraling nosedive.  My plans for a big, special, once in a lifetime trip with my kids next May… almost certainly flatlined on the table with no paddles in sight.  Without using a multiplicity of metaphors (but another ellipsis) … today stank. 

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Now see, I’m usually what you might call a Negative Nancy.  In fact, my just-married co-worker calls me that almost daily.  She sees and calls me out on my tendency toward intense pessimism.  And usually, when bad stuff happens, (like the other day at work when I found out it was going to cost almost $600 to repair the damage my stupidity did to my car)I fall into a despair, have a weeping meltdown, and worry endlessly about what in the wide blessed world I’m going to do about it!  I felt like doing that today, when one thing after another came crashing down on my head.  I did actually indulge in a little crying to Mommy as I was driving home from work, and I did text my counsellor, even though she’s in another state, and I did share the story with a few chosen customer friends, but I didn’t completely go nuclear as I was tempted to do. 

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See, just the other day on Facebook, a friend of mine posted a quote.  It was a pretty good one, so I’ll share it with you:  “The key to happiness is to count your blessings when other people are adding up their troubles.”  Or something like that.  So today I fought against my normal tendency to get mad and worry and fret and stew and get all terrified about what is going to happen.  I decided to make a firm effort to think positive.  As I was performing my closing chores at work, I was mentally going down the list of all the good things in my life.  Here is most of what I came up with:

I have friends and family who love and support me, I have a roof over my head, my car and my house have air-conditioning, I have a job, I have transportation to my job, I have the intelligence and education to go find another job if I have to, I have my health, I have my kids, they have their health, I have food to eat, my kids aren’t hungry, I have all my senses and all my limbs, God always watches over us and protects us, and we can immerse ourselves in the Word and in prayer when we just flat don’t know what else to do.

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Now right before I was thinking all these wonderful positive things, I was deciding what to post on Facebook about all this.  (Because you know, I’m one of those Facebookers.) My first choice was, “They say when it rains, it pours.  Well somebody pass me some scuba gear, because I’m going under!”  But then I wondered how I could turn that concept around and make it positive.  I felt like I was drowning in troubles, and I came up with… you guessed it.  The title of this entry:  I’m not drowning, I’m free-diving for oyster pearls!   See, because I have heard somewhere how those pearl divers just sink down as low as they can go without equipment, hold their breath for incredible amounts of time, and keep searching until they find oysters with amazing, priceless pearls in them!  So despite the fact that things are incredibly bleak right now, I truly am cognizant of the fact that it is often in the lowest depths of difficulty that we find our richest blessings and goodnesses.  Even though I am tempted to worry and fret and fear, I believe in that truth, and I depend on it.  I have to, or I’d go completely insane.

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So truthfully, I’m not giving up on anything just yet.  I’m not cancelling the cruise, because I have until about March to cancel and still get a full refund.  I’m going to put pencil to paper and see what all I can tighten, cut, trim, and forbearance into eternity.  I’m not going to fret, worry, or sell a kidney on the black market.  I’m going to work and pray and trust, and try to listen to what this might be telling me.  I have a few ideas.  Well, one, actually.  I think maybe God’s telling me I need to get back to teaching.  Or maybe He’s just telling me to go get a job at one of the factories or warehouses around here, where they have insurance and 401k’s and better money than I’m making now.  We’ll see.  I’ve been afraid to try to return to the classroom, but maybe I just needed the right motivation!   In closing, I’m reminded of a lyric from a song by Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus, “I Learned From You.”  The pertinent parts are:

…I do not crumble,

… Strength is something you choose.

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Until next time,

D.

 

This Is Crow. This Is Me Eating Crow. Any Questions? March 20, 2011

Three-toed Tree Sloth enjoying a snack.

Image via Wikipedia

Hello all!  Short hiatus, wasn’t it?  Yeah, I found out that when I spend unmentionable amounts of time reading message boards like CruiseCritc, CruiseMates, and DisBoards, I have to have a place to share my rantings, ramblings, and obsessions when there is not a proper forum for them on the boards, or when I feel like I might get immediately flamed, burned in effigy, or worse… ignored!  (GASP!)  So here I am.  I toyed with my layout here, changed it around a bit, and promptly went back to the way it was.  I am sooooo a creature of habit who is NOT OK with change!

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Y’all, I’m suffering from a case of terminal obsession.  All I can think about is the cruise.  I know, I know.  It’s FOURTEEN MONTHS AWAY!  I want to not think about it and live normal life, but it occupies an abnormal amount of my thought time!  The Disney trip, although much closer, is a distant second.  I feel like the Disney trip is pretty much squared away, with the exception of the RideMax touring plans I have to make, but I can’t make those until about a month out.  And of course, there’s shopping for new clothes, and last-minute stuff, but I’m putting that off for about another month as well. 

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I need to focus on updating the status of my everyday life themes, like:

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1)  Weight Watchers.  I finally jumped out of the rut and had a couple of good weeks.  I’m afraid I may have backslid this week, though.  We’ll see.

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2) The boy and his funny stuff.  For example, we finally watched The Blind Side the other night, and you know that part at the end where she warns Michael that if he gets a girl pregnant “out of wedlock,” she will drive up to his school and cut off his penis?  Well, when Daughter S. and I were watching that part and laughing our heads off, MY little man covers his entire face with his hands and says, “I KNOW what ‘penis’ means, Mom, and I do NOT wanna talk about it!”  Y’all- We. ROLLED!  He was not amused.

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3) Work.  Didn’t get the job I applied for, nor ever even heard from them, but have been tapped at my current job by default of being the only one cabable of doing it, to become the new specialist in an area we haven’t been serving much thus far- print services.  I’m not really enthused.  Further, the Girl Drama continues, thanks to She Who Must Not Be Named, AKA Crazy Co-Worker.  She is dishing out her Radioactive Silent Treatment to another co-worker this time, and I get to be the one she cozies up to and pretends to be all buddy-buddy with when she’s pointedly ignoring the other girl.  If it continues tomorrow, I’m going to tell her to grow up, and then I’ll be in the doghouse too.  Seriously.  We are all sooooo ‘way too old’ for this stuff.

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4)  Housework and Garage- EPIC FAIL!  I haven’t turned a tap around here lately (to use my mom’s favorite expression) and it is causing me immense amounts of angst and self-loathing as I continue to scroll, click, read, type, and browse my way through the message boards every spare moment I have.  Unfortunately not enough so to make me get the heck up and DO SOMETHING!  Until now, anyway.  Starting as soon as I finish this post! 😀

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5)  Divorce.  Ladies and gentlemen, I have finally filed the papers.  Officially.  It’s been a long time coming, since we’ve been separated for two years.  I am, in alternating moments, glad I will finally be officially free, sad that it all failed so miserably, and oddly, jealous that he has been totally ignoring me lately in favor of his two best friends.  I have to call the judge’s office tomorrow to make an appointment.  When it comes right down to it, I can freely admit that he is nothing but dead weight to anyone in his life, and I’m fortunate to be free of him, and if he happens to read this, which is really unlikely, well… I’m sorry, but truth hurts.  It is what it is.

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6) Parenting- I have not been very successful of late, at getting the kids to get up off their butts and do anything around here, primarily because ** I ** have not been getting up off my butt either! (DUH) But that all ends tomorrow.  At worst, it will be a hideous fight.  There may be pouting, grouching, slamming, and other variations on a theme, but I have decided that I am going to put away the PlayStations and the laptops from now until the end of April, at least.  Literally package them up and lock them away somewhere.  We have GOT to get a handle on housecleaning and cleaning out the garage, and this is the only way.  We will get them out and use them on Sunday afternoons only, unless their behavior makes it necessary for me to revoke the Sunday afternoon electronics time.  This is drastic, but a crucial step in both getting the house and garage in a decent state, AND bringing an end to my cruise obsession.  On orders from my therapist, The Golden Goddess, I was supposed to ban myself from the computer about 2 weeks ago, but I never did.  I cheated.  Well, I now know I have no choice but to bring it all to a screeching halt.  I will update here on Sundays, and I will savor and enjoy my blogging time, but otherwise, I am going on an Internet Fast!

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And with that I must acknowledge that it is bedtime for munchkins, and I am going to finish up here and get them ready to go back to school tomorrow.  (Kicking and Screaming the entire way, I’m sure.)  They have enjoyed their Spring Break Week Of Imitating Tree Sloths, and now it’s time to “get back to the grind” as Daughter S. glumly announced over supper earlier tonight.  Oh well.  One more ‘nine weeks’ and then it’s Disney World, baby!  Woo!

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Until next time,

D.

 

Jumping Off The Hamster Wheel February 9, 2011

Spectra of constituent blue, green and red pho...

Image via Wikipedia

Hello all.  I can’t seem to get it together enough to post more often than about once every week and a half.  It’s not that I don’t love my little blog here.  Really.  It’s just that my head is in about 40 other places!  Orlando.  The Carribean.  My garage.  China.  You know, from the time my mom told me that she was definitely, officially taking us to Disney World in May, I became obsessed.  I started reading guidebooks and message boards and using words like touringplans.  I learned what acronyms like ADR, FP, and CRT mean.  (In Disney context, anyway.)  Then I started thinking about going overseas to teach ESL.  Then that all got blown out of the water and on to The Boat.  I got the idea to plan a vacation with Daughter S., Daughter J., and The Boy after the girls graduate next year.  We kicked a few things back and forth for a while and finally found the cruise idea to our liking.  Then we promptly discovered and fell in love with Royal Carribean‘s Allure of the Seas.  (See my previous post for the full story there.) 

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As per usual, I was reminded that I have a one-track mind.  No, not that track.  Perv.  Get your mind out of the gutter.  What I meant was that I seem to be able to focus on only one thing at a time.  I get my mind set on one thing and go full-force, all-out, force of nature to be reckoned with, Crazy!  Kind of like Weight Watchers.  I piddled around with my eating habits for years, but once I finally committed to WW, I lost 85 lbs in a year.  None of this is necessarily a bad thing.  It’s not, right? 

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Ok, well the thing is… I can’t get things done in my everyday life when I’m wrapped up in some fantas-tic idea like Disney World or a once-in-a-lifetime cruise.  I forget things.  Important things like vacuuming.  Laundry.  Feeding the fish.  Paying the electric bill.  Brushing my teeth.  Ok, I exaggerate, but only slightly.  I start browsing online, searching for things like RideMax.  Or shore excursions in St. Martin.  Or the Unofficial Guide to Walt Disney World.  And little things like jury duty completely slip my mind.  In my defense, your honor, I didn’t find that letter telling me to be in court on the 24th until Monday.  The 31st.  Hey, those things I forget to do?  Reading the mail’s right up there.  Cleaning off the computer desk where the kids throw the mail so I don’t know it’s there and don’t read it?  That’s another one. 

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I’m sure I must have had a point.  Oh!  I got it:  I need to focus on important stuff.  Like getting my house in order.  Getting my garage cleaned out and ready for my Great Disney Fundraiser Garage Sale Extravaganza!  And blogging.  After I got out of my session with The Golden Goddess today, I was thinking about how this blog came to be and what it was supposed to be about- me working through things, working out things, figuring out what I thought about life and what I wanted to do with it.  I haven’t been doing a lot of that lately.  I’ve been cruise-pricing, Disney dreaming, Facebooking and just generally avoiding reality every chance I got. I know I’ve been running on that “Need to Pull My Head Out” hamster wheel for a long time now, and I decided that I need to either rip the hamster wheel off its axle, flatten it out and get to the end of it, or jump off the thing and find some other place to run!

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I think I lost the point again.  Maybe it’s this:  the world is big.  I have friends and family with big problems, big needs, big fears.  I am so blessed, in so many ways.  I have a tendency to whine sometimes- I know that.  I have a tendency to fret the little things, see only the negative things, and hang onto the knotted end of my mood swings and twirl until I drop into the pool below.  On the opposite end of that spectrum, I can be the most enthusiastic cheerleader anybody ever had.  I can pep-talk, crowd-pump, and enthuse with the best of them.  I can be hyper and happy in one moment and on the edge of a fit of despair the next.  In short, I’m moody.  I know there are improvements to be made and “everyday life” things I need to accomplish.  But overall I’m in a good place right now.  I’m happy.  I’d like to think my outlook would be as positive if I didn’t have Disney and Allure on the horizon, however distant.  For the most part, it would be. I’m sure it would.  I’d have my moments where I couldn’t see the forest for the trees, but mostly I’d know the forest was there.  And I’d be thankful for it.

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Until next time,

D.

 

Bon Voyage: Becoming Cruise Crazy and Falling in Love With a BOAT! January 30, 2011

Oasis of the Seas entering the port at Nassau,...

Image via Wikipedia

Hello all.  I have a serious problem.  I’m. CRAZY!  I have developed an obsession on par with anything tv’s Monk ever suffered.  Actually two obsessions.  I have been obsessed with the details of our Disney World trip for over a month, and NOW I have found a new one:  cruises.  Recently, I hatched a plan to take my dear children on a trip for the girls’ graduation, something I could do for them myself, without help from my mother.  (Please note:  I am extreeeeeemely appreciative of my parents and all they do for me.  I’m grateful, I’m thankful, I’m ecstatic.  That being said, I also suffer from constantly not feeling like a full-grown adult because it feels like they help me much more than they should have to at my current age!)

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So anyway.  I decided I wanted to take some kind of special trip for us as a family, something I would plan, arrange, schedule, pay for, and carry out all by myself.  I tossed some ideas to the kids, such as a second Disney trip, Vegas, New Orleans, Branson, Port Aransas, TX (those last two both previous family vacation spots) or a cruise.  I talked to the kids and told them to discuss among themselves what they wanted to do and get back to me.   Meanwhile, I was already getting my heart set on a cruise.  Based on my research, I knew that cruises are always getting more affordable for the ‘less than wealthy’ such as myself, and that with the option of paying it out over time, along with last minute discounts, etc., I could probably make a great cruise vacation happen. 

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Now let me just say here, I think I have been to every cruise booking, low pricing, discount-offering website on the entire internet.  Cruises.com, CruiseCompete, VacationsToGo, Orbitz, Priceline, Hotwire- you name it, I’ve surfed it.  They’ve begun to run together, but here are the realities so far:  1) If I had a brain in my head or any semblance of reasonableness or responsibility, I’d save $$ by not having to fly anywhere and sail out of the closest port to where we live, which is Galveston.  2) Only Carnival and Royal Carribean regularly sail out of Galveston.  3) The kids were interested in a Disney cruise for the characters and character dining, but Disney is pretty pricey, and the only other ships that currently offer characters on board are a small number of Royal Carribean ships that have Dreamworks characters.  Two of these are the Oasis of the Seas and the Allure of the Seas, both of which are MONSTER ships that hold a maximum capacity of over 6000 passengers.   4) Royal Carribean also offers Broadway musicals (!) on the Oasis and the AllureHairspray and Chicago, respectively.  5) I could have lived with cruising out of Galveston until I discovered the character dining and Chicago production on RCL, and from that moment, there was only one ship for me:  The Allure

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A little disclosure here- I never wanted to go on a mega-ship.  I have always asserted that if I were to ever go on a cruise, I would want a nice, quiet, friendly, intimate little ship that holds two- to three- thousand people.  But here I am, completely hooked on this idea, having every intention of doing whatever I have to do to make a cruise on the Allure a reality.    I mean seriously?  This ship has everything.  No, I mean EVERYthing.  Wanna rock climb?  They’ve got it.  Wanna learn to surf on a FlowRider or ride on a Zipline?  They’ve got it.  Want Mystery Theater, ice skating, aqua theater?  How about a carousel?  Central park?  Pizza restaurant?  Ice cream?  Donut shop?  A dozen different bars, lounges, and clubs?  Learn to salsa dance?  Ice carving?  Yep.  They’ve got it.

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And you thought I was kidding.  So basically, even though I am fully aware that I will have to work, pinch, scrimp, save, mortgage the farm, and possibly sell a kidney and a cornea or two, I have decided that this is the cruise we want, on the ship we want, and I am going to book it as soon as I get my tax return back.  I’m going to look around and find the best travel agent I can find and get the best deal I can, and I’m going to take my kids on a ginormous floating amusement park.  Oh, wait- where does it go?  You know, it hardly matters.  As it happens, the itinerary is Fort Lauderdale, Florida; Nassau, Bahamas; Charlotte Amalie, St. Thomas; Philipsburg, St. Maarten; Fort Lauderdale, Florida.  Oops- did I mention it sails out of Fort Lauderdale?  Yeah, so I have to add air travel on top of the cruise.  Brilliant, right?  Falling in love with a ship that leaves from 1400 miles away.  But what’s done is done.  As of right now, I am bound and determined to make this happen.  Daughter S. is already salivating over the giant cupcake as big as her head from the Cupcake Bakery; Daughter J. is looking forward to the How to Train Your Dragon ice show and dining with Shrek, and The Boy?  Hopefully this is not an ill omen, but he showed particular interest in how you get into the bridge and what button you push to make it go.  He’s just ready for the whole thing.  You know what?  So am I! 

*

Bon Voyage!

Until next time,

D.  

PS- The picture above is the Oasis, the older of the two monster-ships.  I know they’re both pretty ugly from the outside, somewhat resembling a floating cracker box, but hey, why quibble?  They’ve got all the goodies.  And… we like goodies!

 

 
The Therapy Journals of the Fat-Headed Klingon Woman

One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

Shawn L. Bird

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