The Therapy Journals of the Fat-Headed Klingon Woman

One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

Stream of Consciousness Rambling. With a Soundtrack. October 11, 2012

Hello all.

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Ok, so right now, here’s how I’m feeling:  restless.  I’m at work, and I’m all caught up, and I’m completely alone in the building, and I’m bored senseless.  I’m listening to my iTunes (yes, in a church building.  Currently I’m hearing “What Doesn’t Kill You (Makes You Stronger)” and desk-dancing to it)  I’m dying to text someone and check in to say hi.  Almost anyone will do at this point.

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Man, I wish I could dance.  My favorite self-disparaging remark on my dancing talent is that I move like the Tin Man getting electrocuted.  I’m listing to “Dynomite” now, and I’d love to be up and moving instead of sitting here typing and tapping my toe and bobbing my head and shoulders.  That’s about the extent of my rhythmic abilities.

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Next up, “Firework.”  I would so love to sing this one at karaoke.  And I think I will, eventually.  We’re having karaoke at the next family reunion if I have to sell a kidney on the black market.  At least I can sing here at work.  It goes over a lot better in an empty church building than behind the counter at the register at the UPS Store.  (That’s where I worked before, and where I plan on spending a few Saturdays leading up to Christmas.  Extra funds for gifts for the spoiled rotten offspring, you know.)

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I actually love the freedom of this job.  I can come in and leave whenever I want.  I can bring my kid with me and homeschool him.  I can listen to music and sing, and hope someone doesn’t come down the hall and surprise me making a fool of myself.  As long as I get my tasks done and don’t do anything sinful in the process, they don’t care.  I literally write and sign my own paycheck.  It’s actually kinda weird.

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And finally, we’re hearing “Fire Burning” by Sean Kingston.  This is another one I’d kill to be able to dance to, no kidding.  Maybe I ought to just check into lessons or something.

A Different Church Building

A Different Church Building (Photo credit: justshootingmemories) Our building looks a little like this.

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Ok, well, must go now, because my co-worker/boss will be here shortly and requires my assistance to follow him over to the tire shop and give him a ride back over here, so I’d better go clean out my embarrassing car.  The inside isn’t even the most embarrassing part.  The worst part is the horrible screeching grinding sound my brakes are making continuously, even when I’m not braking.  I really need that looked at, but I can’t afford it right now.  Y’all can pray they don’t fail at the most inopportune moment and get me killed.

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Thanks for listening to my ramble along with my dance party playlist.  More later.  Holla! 🙂

Until next time,

D.

 

 

Ok, NOW I’ve Worked Out! April 11, 2011

iTunes includes visualizers. Shown here is a v...

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Hello all!  Well, today there was another episode of alien body snatching, and I found myself at TFP- The Fitness Professional at 5:40 IN the morning, to participate in something called Turbo!  I think its full name is actually “TurboKick, or The Workout That Kicks Your A$$ and Initially Makes You into a Pathetic, Quivering Blob of Wuss-Ness Until You Get the Hang of It and Become a Fierce Machine” but we’ll shorten it for time’s sake! 

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So there I was, ready to Turbo it up, and the class started, and I kept up for a little while, but eventually I felt like Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality, you know, where she’s in the class with all the other pageant contestants, just making up moves as she goes along?  Yeah.  Definitely me.  So I make it through the class, but I don’t feel like I did a good enough job.. I don’t feel like I really hit it hard.  So I come home, get the kids ready for school, take them to school, return home, and decide I’m gonna hop on the treadmill for a while.  So I start out slowly, warming up with no real idea or intention of how long I’m gonna go.  I always think I’ll just walk for 15 or 20 minutes, maybe 30.  But then I put my laptop close by me, brought up iTunes, cranked up my exercise playlist and walked.  And walked.  And walked!  I kept thinking, Ok, I’ll stop after 2 songs.  Ok, I’ll stop at the next 5 minute mark.  Ok, I’ll stop when I hear a song by this particular artist.  Well… I ended up warming up slow for 5 minutes, then cranking it up on high speed and walking for FIFTY-FIVE minutes!!  That’s 55, people!  Plus another 5 minute slow cool-down.  I think my music helped.  Here are the songs I walked through:

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So there you have it.  I walked for an hour and 5 minutes total.  I sweated like a pig.  I got in 3.2 miles and over 7500 steps.  I earned 4 Weight Watchers points.  And I am Proud of My Self, yes I am.  It’s only a little after 10 and I still have to go to work and be on my feet and walk all day, and I need to make the kids walk when I get home, so I wouldn’t be surprised if I get in over 15,000 steps today.  Woooo!  Go me! 

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Until next time,

D.

P.S.  Thanks to my youngest sister, I am planning to sign up for something that sounds like awesome good dirty fun, and that is The Dirty 30 Race!  A 5k + 7 tons of mud + 15 obstacles = a heck of a good time!  Oh, it’s in July.  In Mulhall Oklahoma.  In mud.  A 5k.  Who doesn’t want to do that!?  Find one near you!

 

I Had No Ideas Whatsover! (Wonder how you say that in Spanish?) August 24, 2010

Hello all.  Tonight is one of those nights where I don’t have any particular ideas in mind, or things I really want to talk about, so I’m just going to start typing and see where the road leads.  I apologize in advance for the loss of the next few minutes of your life, but gratefully thank you for reading!

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My son cracked me up this morning.  I was still on my own bed, but I was yelling at him, asking if he was up yet.  He didn’t answer, so I yelled his first and middle name, and I heard this exasperated, sighing, more than a little annoyed voice answer, “YES, MOTHER!”  🙂  Then again, he always cracks me up.  He prides himself on his funny little antics and absolutely loves making people laugh. 

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Great thing today- we got rain.  I mean real rain, not one of those that’s just enough drizzle to make the grass strain upward desperately and beg.  It sprinkled a few days ago, which was good, but it wasn’t enough.  We hadn’t had rain in so long, I turned on my windshield wipers and they looked at me with puppy-dog eyes like they didn’t know what to do!

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I was reading some other blogs this morning.  I should never do that.  It just gives me a complex and makes me feel like I should give up writing and apply to clown college.  Some of the writers out there seem soooo talented.  Some of them just like to say f*ck a lot. 

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My 20-year class reunion is coming up next month.  I absolutely deny that I am old enough to have been out of school for TWENTY years!  I was a child prodigy who graduated from high school at age 10.  That’s what it is.  Yeah, that’s my story.  What do you mean I’m full of crap!?  Well who needs you, anyway?  Oh that’s right-  I do, or this thing would be non-existent!  Ok, so the reunion is coming up and I don’t have a thing to wear!  It’s not a fancy-schmancy, la-di-da affair- just a catered dinner and dance at the Elks’ Lodge.  (Boy, does that sound Small Town!)   The dress code isn’t too demanding- it’s just business casual.  The problem is that everything I own is either 3 sizes too big or looks like an old lady, or both!!  I bought a dress a while back, that I actually love, but I don’t have the proper undergarments to wear with it.  It’s a halter top dress, and since I don’t have a strapless or halter top bra, I could either wear a tank top under it or some kind of shirt over it, but I don’t really think it would look right.  So I’m stuck either wearing something I already have that is all baggy and old lady-ish, or borrowing something from I-know-not-whom!  Guess I’ll just have to keep working on it.  The date is Sept. 18, so I have a little less than a month to get this problem solved! 

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Daughter S. is taking Spanish this year, and I think it’s going to be really fun to re-learn it along with her.  My poor Spanish teacher in high school only lasted one year because she was not accustomed to what rotten little beasties high school kids can be.  She found out quick when one little punk made a hairspray can torch in the back of the classroom.  Miss Rosa was much better suited to teaching elementary school, I think.  I was showing off to Daughter S. this morning the only things I learned in that class:  the words to La Bamba, and the Pledge of Allegience in Spanish.  (Which I can never recall the first phrase of- arguably the most important part- the ‘I pledge allegience’ part!)  Just for the halibut, I’ll show it off again, minus appropriate punctuation marks:

(I pledge allegience)

a la bandera

de los Ustados Unidos de America.

y a la Republica que representa

Una nacion, bajo Dios, indivisible

con libertad y justicia para todos.

_________________________________

This post is dying on the vine, so I guess I’m going to give it up for now.  The Boy was working on his homework and he decided he was going to “take a break.”  Only now it’s after 9:30 p.m. and he’s not doing homework and he’s not getting ready for bed either, so it’s time to provide some gentle guidance:  GET READY FOR BED, YOU LITTLE CRUMB-CRUNCHER! 

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Maybe for the next entry I’ll translate the meaning of the words to La Bamba.  You guys totally better run for the hills! 

Until next time,

D.

(ETA:  MILESTONE!!!  Apparently this is my 100th post!  I know it’s just a beginning compared to some of the blogs that have been out there for a while, but wow!  I can’t believe I’ve already gotten this far!  I’m also pushing 2700 total views since I started this thing.  Thanks again to everyone who has taken the time to read me, and super thanks to those who keep coming back!  Hugs to you!)

 

 
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One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

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