The Therapy Journals of the Fat-Headed Klingon Woman

One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

Lonely Monkey Syndrome August 9, 2013

Lonely Monkey Ape at Zoo

Lonely Monkey Ape at Zoo (Photo credit: epSos.de)

Hello all.  So here’s the deal.  I’m feeling a little down, drowsy, and blah today.  I realize that compared to my post yesterday, it’s the polar opposite, but if you’ve been reading me longer than five minutes, you know that’s how I roll.  I call it emotional bungee jumping.  Anyway.  It’s not that I just feel that way for the fun of it.  The problem lies in the area of social media and how some of us connect nowadays.  In short- Facebook.  I know I talk about it a lot.  It’s one of my most frequently used outlets to connect and reach out to friends, family, and assorted others.   I acknowledge this and I’m ok with it.  That’s not exactly the problem.

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The problem here is that I am a Facebook OVER-user.  I am constantly getting flack from some people in my life who tell me that I put too much stuff out there.  I post too much of my daily life, my thoughts and feelings, what I had for lunch (healthy eating victories), what socks I’m wearing (random urge to wear Christmas socks in July), what I did at work (Les Mis withdrawals and a mini desk-barricade), and random song lyrics that pop into my head (because I work with one headphone in my ear as much as possible and I have my entire iTunes on shuffle, so there’s no telling what comes up.)  So yeah, I’m one of THOSE Fb people, but I do have some self-control:  I don’t share a lot of recipes, political posts, Like this Page if You Love God, Keep Scrolling if you’re heartless, etc.  Those are dumb.  Ok, not the recipes.

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I’m really trying hard here, to make this a well-thought out discourse on why people are the way they are with regard to social media.  In my own case, it has to do with my work environment.  I work in a church building, as the secretary for a TV/Radio/Internet ministry overseen by the elders of this particular congregation.  I sit in a big empty room, I answer the phone and send free Bible CDs and DVDs to people who call and request them or send an email form.  I am frequently the only one in the building, and even when I’m not, I don’t talk much to the 2 or 3 people who are here.  In short- I have no interaction!  I’m not in the public, I’m not dealing with customers, other than briefly on the phone.  It’s quiet, and it’s dull.  I order supplies, I duplicate and label DVDs and CDs, I pay bills and make deposits from donations.  That’s it.  Basically, I think I over-use Fb because I’m a little bored and a lot un-challenged.  And lonely.  That too.  Facebook is like being with your friends, even when you’re not.  And insanely, you miss them when they aren’t on it anymore if that was your main method of contact!  I’ll say it again:  Facebook is like being with your friends, even when you’re not.

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Ok, so we know that, and we know it’s just how some people use the site.  Fine, what’s the problem?  Well, it’s the struggle between just being who you are, doing what you do, and not caring if people think you are a big old NERD… and knowing that this is something that brings you comfort and enjoyment but people think you’re a dork for it.  THAT is my problem.  I know, I’ve been told more than once that I worry way too much about what people think.  Noted.  But that struggle is the source of my mood today!  When I’m bored and lonely, I feel like posting some random boring junk on social media, but I know that I am in essence making a bigger fool out of myself with each ‘like,’ comment, and share.  Which makes the mood worse, and it all just sort of rolls downhill.

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Blessed are those who are not aware that Facebook over-usage is self-embarrassment and can like, share, and comment to their heart’s content.  I either need to Facebook (in its verb sense) less, learn how to not care what people think, or do more things with friends in real life.  Maybe all three.  Alternatively, maybe I just need a more active, interesting, challenging, and people-related job!  You think? 🙂

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Until next time,

D.

 

4 Responses to “Lonely Monkey Syndrome”

  1. Mandie Says:

    I totally miss everyone since I ditched Facebook! No Facebook or cell phone at work for me anyway or I’d be texting and pinning all day!

    • Exactly! I still get things done, of course. But I don’t really have to devote an incredible amount of brain cells to the performance of my assigned tasks, as it were. Maybe that’s where the ‘monkey’ thing comes in. But as long as you still have a cell phone available in the evenings… HINT HINT!! Thanks for reading. Miss your face! 🙂

  2. K Says:

    You’re fantastic. – K


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