The Therapy Journals of the Fat-Headed Klingon Woman

One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

About My Blog Title… January 21, 2010

Filed under: Aging Angst,General Observations,Weight Woes — DDKlingonGirl @ 4:21 pm

Some of you may be wondering about the title of this blog.  What is a fat-headed Klingon Woman, anyway?  Well, first a little background information.  You may or may not be ready to hear this, but I’m fat.  I’m overweight.  I can say it.  I’m not chubby, chunky, dumpy, or fluffy.  I’m just plain fat, ok?  But I’m working on it; I’m changing habits and actions, and someday that statement will be in the past tense.  Got it?  Ok, good.  Now the story.

In the winter of the year of my 20th Class Reunion (STRESS!) the skin on my face suddenly went insane.  When I got out of the shower on New Year’s Day 2010, (where I had been imagining a conversation with God about my Facebook status- more on that later) my face felt different.  As I air-dried under the ceiling fan, it became a tight, flaky mask that made me wonder how something could sag and puff simultaneously!  I studied myself in the mirror, thinking about what I’d just written on Facebook about this year being one of transformation.

I briefly considered, in the motorcycle sidecar of my mind, how much moving I was going to have to do to gradually shrink this body.  I saw a hazy, cloudy vision of myself becoming one of those exercise fiends, one of those people I like to refer to as sick and twisted, who get up at 5:00 a.m. to make it to a 6:00 a.m. Turbo class.  And I saw a much clearer verson of myself as the Fat Headed Klingon Woman I now saw in the mirror. (Apologies to Gene Roddenberry.) 

It was just that I had reached the point where even my forehead had enough padding on it to smoosh as I slept on my sides in the night.  Consequently, I woke up and looked in the mirror every morning at these great, fading, diagonal red lines over both sides of my face that reminded me of the Klingons on Star Trek! 

Life as an Extra-Terrestrial was not what I had envisioned for myself, so as my 300+ pound body silently double-dog-dared me to try to change it, I moved my thoughts of me as a “Person Who Exercises” from the sidecar to the driver’s seat of my mind, hoping that they would grab the handlebars and just take off down the highway.

So far, they’re just idling in park, but if we ever get anywhere on this exercise road trip, I’ll get the word out. 

Until next time,



Hello world!

Filed under: General Observations — DDKlingonGirl @ 3:40 pm

Hello all!  As this is my first post, I will make it short and sweet by sharing the About Me section of my profile- the obligatory background information.  Here goes- I am:

Entering what I define as Early Middle Age- late 30s, kids still in school but getting up there, non-traditional college graduate at 35, starting to wonder what’s left.

I love my family.  I want to travel and see the world, but I get worried I’ll never have the funds it takes to accomplish that dream.  I plan to start with Alaska and Disney World, for the kids of course.

I have a B.A. in English Education, but am not teaching currently.  After a year of personal and professional blows in 2009, I’m working with a therapist who is trying to bring out the Fierce Woman in me.  I have defined myself as a writer and poet for a good part of my life now, and have decided to try sharing that part of me with the world at large, hence the new blog.  If you want to know what this blog will contain, you’ll just have to keep reading me!  Let the good times roll, and happy reading!


The Therapy Journals of the Fat-Headed Klingon Woman

One woman's journey to becoming Her True Self

Shawn L. Bird

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